Holding onto what is hurting you , will hinder your healing.
Heartache is a horrible thing, especially when deep down we know that we did everything we could have done to try and save a relationship, but still it fell apart because of the struggle and differences or perhaps he gave up.
Break ups definitely take their toll and they tend magnify feelings and thoughts of rejection, failure, loss and hopelessness (among many others) .
It’s easy to lose focus in a season of painful change; it’s also likely that you’ll lose perspective on the situation, your own self value and your ex.
The good news is that you don’t have to let the failure of one relationship define your present value and future hopes. Everything does happen for a reason and sometimes we are asked to put good (and definitely bad) things down so we can be free to pick up GREAT things.
So let’s focus on 5 reasons why its time to dry your eyes, pick yourself up , let go and move forward into a better future:
1: This is just a season in a lifetime
When our world and heart is falling apart it’s easy to get lost in the present emotional turbulence and lose perspective. Don’t forget that these few months or a year are only a drop in an ocean of a lifetime.
You have so much waiting for you , don’t get stuck in a moment, acknowledge it, mourn but then also make the conscious decision to remind yourself that better things are coming and that heartache is only for a season.
You will heal, you will fall in love again and you won’t die alone .
He wasn’t the right one for you, and holding onto something that wasn’t meant to be will only hinder you from reaching what is meant to be.
2: There is someone waiting to treat you better
Goodness this is so true and it’s so easy for us to forget that when we are so focused on someone we love. The thing is sometimes when we have been in an unhealthy relationship we also forget what’s actually normal, and we need to remind ourselves that there IS a man out there waiting to give us our hearts desires and respect, value and treasure us.
Relationships are hard work, but they are also meant to be full of joy, peace and progression. It’s crazy that we get so caught up in trying to dissect unhealthy relationships, where we went wrong, what ifs etc, instead of just letting it go because at the end of the day it was not right or edifying anyway!
Stop trying to fix something that was broken from the start, sometimes it isn’t you, it’s them and their baggage and you deserve a whole lot more.
3: You have a bright future
Your relationships do not define you! It’s not a test and there is no pass or fail, each one has purpose to grow you in some shape or form so stop putting your eggs in one basket.
Don’t get stuck in the past or so tied up in the present heartache that you forget what a bright future awaits you. Everyday you are able to make choices on what you are going to allow to continue and what needs to be addressed and finished.
See the bigger picture, refocus your attention on what you DO have, not what you don’t as hope sometimes lies in out potential.
4: This does not define you or your future
Just because this relationship did not work out, it does not mean your next one won’t either. It’s important to reflect and acknowledge why it didn’t last but it does not in any way define who you are or what you’re capable of.
We all make mistakes, people change and I’m sure most of us have dated the wrong type of guy at some stage! So relax, take a breath and start again, the relationship that you are deserving of has no expiry date.
5: Life is meant to be full of joy !
It’s time to brush yourself off and remember that life is not meant to be miserable and we were not created to be alone or treated like crap.
You have the free choice of what people you decide to invite and entertain in your life, so choose wisely so that you can set yourself up for an easy for filling relationship.
Learn how to be happy in your season of change and singleness, don’t let another person be the basis for your emotional fulfilment because you’ll be sorely disappointed.
Stand tall, surround yourself with people that love you and focus on moving forward and living in the happiness you were always destined for.