Growing up and becoming an adult should come with a warning sticker…
Or at least instructions, because Lord knows everything seems a whole lot easier when we are children! Love especially gradually becomes more and more complicated and what use to be as simple as ” will you go out with me ” has now become a battlefield full of mind games, second guessing, confusing signals and everything else in between!
Perhaps it’s because we become a little tainted , picky or broken and therefore our level of comprise goes one way or the other to the extreme instead of finding the healthy balance.
But is love really that complicated or are we just cultivating bad habits and decisions which in turn make what could be so black and white a whole pot of 50 shades of grey instead? Let’ s look at 6 signs that indicate that you are indeed making your life a lot harder than it needs to be:
1:You see a situation for what you want it to be , not what it is.
We all have dreams and expectations on life , but sometimes they can blur the reality of what is really happening in front of us . It’s all very good to try and help a man grow or “change” and stick through the “tough phase” with him, but where exactly do you draw the line?
Often we base our actions in a relationship off what we want it to be rather than what it actually is , therefore we wonder why we never get the peace and progress we long for.
It’s time to get back to basics and assess whether or not your man and relationship actually has what it takes to be healthy . There is no point saying love is complicated when in reality it’s just your man is complicated or toxic.
2: Your expectations exceed reality.
This means that you have lost a little grip on reality and perhaps have driven a lot of men away. Whilst it’s important to have standards , it’s also equally as important to know where the limits would be on placing high and unrealistic expectations on someone.
The best way to simplify love is to sit down and write a list of the true fundamental basics that are required to make both people happy , the rest is just a bonus!
3: You can’t handle the truth.
Basically you are in denial…meaning you would rather make up excuses for why your relationships aren’t working out, or why you are sticking with a douche bag just so you don’t have to face the truth ( which for a lot of people brings fear).
Love isn’t easy , it also isn’t meant to be full of conflict , anxiety or constant problems. Acknowledging the truth of your situation isn’t giving up on love or that person , but rather it’s the first step to understanding how you can start to turn everything around.
4: You haven’t worked out your bad dating habits.
That’s right it all starts with you! To attract a healthy and for filling relationship you first have to do some groundwork on yourself.
This means identifying your bad habits and understanding why you do them, then working to change them into positive ones.
If you keep acting and thinking the same , then nothing is going to change, you need to rescue yourself first before a man can then re-rescue you .
5: You have more anxiety than peace.
Life is meant to be enjoyed and fun , and love is meant to give us butterflies and gooey feelings! Why should you settle for heartache, stress and struggle when it doesn’t actually have to be like that!
Don’t kid yourself, plenty of people are happy and have found a love that works not because they are lucky but because they have CHOSEN to make the right decisions that lead to a for filling love.
If your man is still spinning the same stories and everything is just going round in circles , then it’s time to get off that train and make the choice to find a relationship that is full of peace , progress and joy!
6: You are still searching for The One.
I see so many ladies as they get older complain about how they can’t find a man blah blah.. ladies let me simplify it for you : perfect doesn’t exist , but great men do !
It’s all very good to whine about what the men can’t offer, but what are you offering? What can you bring to the table that will attract the RIGHT type of man? Keep your mind and heart in check as well as your actions, remember you are the common denominator in all of this.