Q: How do I tell everyone that my relationship has ended? #AskRenee

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Sharing the news is never easy…

A: The truth is no matter how we choose to tell people, nothing can really help us with those initial emotions attached to sharing the truth about your break up.

Feeling of pain, shame and the sense that everyone will either judge you or ask a million questions (which of course you don’t want to answer!)

It’s an awful process , especially after such an awful occurrence , however whilst sending a group email to everyone and then going into hibernation for the next 10 years may seem more desirable then facing the music, there are some more practical methods.

The trick is to remember that this is your life and that you don’t have to explain, justify or even talk about it with anyone if you don’t want to.

Guaranteed people will want to know or will notice something has changed, so here are a few tips to handle the time when it comes:

  • Firstly remember that you are not defined by the success or failure of a relationship and this break-up does not sum up your existence nor does it have to hinder your future.
  • Keep your answer/ reason brief and only divulge what you truly want to, it’s your business and no one has to know the gory details if you don’t want them to.
  • Try not to announce it on social media, unless you want lots of questions and comments!
  • Feel free to say “ I don’t really want to talk about it” or “ we have gone our separate ways” and other closed responses so that people aren’t encouraged to ask more questions.
  • Take your time, don’t feel you have to tell everyone straight away , eventually they will find out and in the meantime use the time to heal a little
  • Steer clear of big social occasions for a little while until you are ready to start answering everyone’s questions, this isn’t about isolating yourself , but rather just using the time to mend your heart .

Remember that as hard as this time is, it is only for a short season , and each day is one day closer to being healed , whole and happy again .

Break ups and rejection are not easy to process , but through them we can learn more about our own value and what we truely deserve in a relationship

 

Image courtesy of nenetus at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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