The 5 Love Languages – Gary Chapman
What it’s about
This book is probably one that you’ve heard of before or been referenced in something you’ve seen or read. It basically sums up 5 ways or love languages that we use to communicate in our relationships in life. These are: Words of affirmation, Gifts, Acts of Service, Quality Time and Physical Touch. Chapman breaks down what each love language involves and how to identify what your own language is. He talks about primary and secondary love languages and how they relate to your relationships whether it is with your partner, family or friends.
Where it gets interesting is how your own upbringing and way you were loved determines your receiving love language. However this does not mean that your way of receiving love is the same language for giving love back. Sound complicated? Well it isn’t and it’s quite a well thought out read with practical advice, real case studies and contains fundamental knowledge that we all need in communicating with the people in our life.
Lastly the great thing about this book is it has versions for married couples, singles, children and teenagers ( seems no one is excused from knowing how to communicate properly!)
What it means
Communication and love are the two most integral things in a relationship, combine them and you have a strong foundation. The great thing about this book is it helps you identify the different ways in which you and your loved ones not only receive love, but also give love. By reading each of the different types of love languages and applying the questions to yourself at the end of each chapter you will be able to determine what your primary love language is, for example mine is Quality Time as I felt most loved when my parents spent time with me doing things together. This is the way in which I receive love; however the way in which I give love is through Acts of Service or doing things for others.
For my partner his primary love is Words of affirmation and I actually think his secondary love is the same as well. Each person receives and gives love differently and the good thing is, that even if your partner doesn’t read the book you can still apply the test to him , work out which way he receives love and then adjust your words and actions to suit this love language. You’d be surprised the positive response you will get from just making a few simple changes. At the end of the day we all are individuals who come from different homes and habits and its just a matter of understanding the way each other works in best order to communicate properly. Head to the Quick Advice section of my blog and I break down what each love language is so feel free to take a crash course, otherwise jump on board read this book and make your life easier 😉
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