Marriage is a huge step as we all know, because the aim is to spend the rest of your life committed to that one person.
Often as women we can get caught up in the romantic side of this occasion i.e.: the wedding, and in turn forget certain qualities that are needed to make a marriage successful. Every relationship takes consistent hard work, but there are definitely certain things you need to know about your future husband before you take that leap.
So let’s take a look at 8 things which you should experience or talk about with your significant other, before you embark on the next level.
1. Have a Fight
Okay so if you are human and normal like the rest of us, then you have no doubt done this already! Fighting with your spouse is completely normal in any relationships, however it’s how they fight that counts. If your partner is aggressive, abusive, scary, passive/aggressive, or perhaps plays manipulating mind games to win a fight, then those are red flags you need to watch out after. Fighting isn’t about wining, it’s about trying to communicate and solve an issue.
2. Travel Together
They say you don’t really know someone until your travel with them. It’s true!Travelling with your partner not only gives you great memories but it also reveals how they act in different and foreign environments and situations. This isn’t so much about going on a 5 Star holiday and lying by the pool, but rather going on an adventure that stretches you out of your comfort zone.
3. Date for at Least 1-2 Whole Years Together
Whilst some people may argue that there should be no time limit to get married, I beg to differ. The more time you spend with someone, the better you get to know the ‘real’ them. Plus by going through different phases of your life and relationship together, you will better understand if they and you both have what it takes to keep the relationship strong long after the chemistry has simmered down.
4. Discuss Children
Even if you don’t want them, you still need to chat about it to make sure you are both on the same page.
5. Pre Marriage Counselling
Let’s get one thing straight. You don’t have to have problems to have counselling. Sometimes it’s all about equipping yourself instead to give your marriage the best chance possible. Pre marriage counselling is great for getting into all those little issues as well as talking about the bigger ones which you may have (avoided) or not thought to talk about yet.
6. Spend Time Apart
It’s not healthy to live in each other’s pockets and whilst it’s not ideal to do a long distance relationship, spending time apart from each other is a must. Firstly, it makes your miss each other, secondly it gives you an idea of the true strength of your relationship and love for one another. It also really indicates how much effort one person is willing to communicate with the other and also identifies any trust issues.
7. See Him Drunk
This might seem crazy and it might not even apply to you! However, it’s good toknow how your future hubby acts when under the influence. Does he become another person? Does he get aggressive? Is alcohol an issue for him? Whilst this may seem like an out of the ordinary question to ask yourself, it is important especially if you know there could be an issue.
8. Talk About Finances
According to Relationships Australia, the number 1 reason for relationship breakups is financial pressure. We all know how much stress debt and lack can bring, so make sure you and your partner talk about what your stance on finances are, who should contribute what, how much debt each person has etc.
Of course there are many more points I can add to the list, but try these first 8 to get yourself started and remember a successful marriage is created by the decisions and choices we make
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