Because parenting isn’t always easy.
Having kids can be one of the most wonderful and rewarding experiences of your life. It really does change everything though. There is a lot of work involved, and kids tend to be on your mind almost every moment of every day.
Given this dynamic, it’s no surprise that some couples struggle to keep their marriage strong after kids arrive. Instead of being romantic partners, you become partners that have loads of responsibility and work to do all the time. Here are a few ideas to help you keep your marriage strong once you have kids.
Get Comfortable Calling A Babysitter
One of the best ways to keep your relationship strong is to make sure you get to spend some alone time together, and that probably means calling in a babysitter once in a while. A lot of parents resist this idea in the beginning since it can be hard to imagine leaving a baby alone with anyone else.
If you happen to lives near family members or relatives, this can be a great way to ease into things. If not though, you should try to find a babysitter that makes you feel comfortable.
You can start slow at first. Maybe the sitter watches your little one for an hour while you go out for a cappuccino or a glass of wine across town. After a little while you can build up to spending a few hours away and doing something even more fun.
Kids Free Date Night
When the two of you do get out of the house together, you might try making it a “kids free night”. Now, I know what you’re thinking. Of course you aren’t going to bring the kids on your date. But, what I mean is that it might be nice to have a night where you don’t talk about daycare, car seats, potty training, stollers, or any other kid related topic either.
It’s natural for the two of you to spend a lot of your time talking about kids in general. But, by avoiding this topic on date night, you will have a chance to talk about all sorts of other things. This in turn will set the stage for a fun and memorable evening.
TV In Moderation
In this day and age, it’s all too easy to throw something on Netflix at the end of the day after the kids go to bed. After all, you might find that on most nights, you’re exhausted. So, this can be a great way to unwind. The problem though is that this takes away from the time that you and your spouse might do something more interactive together.
Don’t get me wrong, if you happen to have a couple of shows that you love to watch together, it can be great. But, I would suggest you keep these TV nights to a couple times a week. On other nights, maybe the two of you can have a nice conversation over dessert or tea. Or, do something a little romantic if the mood is right…
A Weekend Away
Date nights can be great, but they do tend to fly by in the blink of an eye. So, on occasion it can be really nice to plan a weekend getaway. Now, this is easier said than done. If you are lucky enough to have relatives that live in the area, you might be able have them watch the kids while you and your spouse have a weekend excursion. Or, you can always take a trip to visit family, and then take off for a couple of days on your own.
Naturally, this isn’t the sort of thing that you’re likely to be able to do very often. But even finding a weekend or two a year together can make a big difference.
Sometimes with everything going on day to day, it can be really easy to let your love life take a back seat. It does take a little effort to maintain a strong marriage. In the end though, it’s well worth it.
Author Bio:Ryan Howard runs SmartParentAdvice, a site that provides parenting advice for moms and dads. Ryan writes about all of the different ups and downs of parenting, provides solutions to common challenges, and reviews products that parents need to purchase for babies and toddlers.