Q: Is there such a thing as The One? #askRenee
A: This is a tricky question, and really the answer comes down to your own personal state of mind. If YOU believe that there is a special one person for you then there is, however most of the time we fall in love a few times before we find someone whom we can imagine the rest of our lives with.
Of course there are people who have been married and then divorced or others who have lost their significant other to death; this does not mean that who they were with was not the One.
I remember a speaker once answering this question and she put it like this: If you are walking down the aisle ( on your wedding day ) and you look at your husband to be and think in your heart and mind “ this is the one!” then why 10 years down the track has that thought changed?
It’s still the same physical man you married and you are still the same physical woman. Yes people and circumstances change, but ultimately it is your state of mind and heart that determines whether or not this man is your “One” for a season or a lifetime.
For me what determined whether or not I had met my “One” was the following things:
1) there are mutual feelings ,chemistry and love ( not a case of one person liking one more than the other )
2) Our values , beliefs, goals and ideals line up ( we are parallel in a way )
3) We are compatible , have common interests, hobbies etc.
4) He makes me laugh, we have fun and it’s EASY
5) He respects me, romances me and has a healthy understanding of how a relationship works ( including effective communication)
6) There is peace and joy!.
In essence it is a partnership , not a battle ! Relationships take consistent hard work but it doesn’t have to be a constant struggle.